Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting
you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left
realistically the space under my bed is very small so if a monster did in fact live there it would have to also be very small
it would be some kind of baby monster
i would have to look after it
The true horror: responsibility
nice gender did your mom pick it out for you
No, my dad did.
I literally scrolled past this and then scrolled back up real quick to reblog because I finally understood the joke.
I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND
i’M LAUGHING SO HARD
If men aren’t allowed to have an opinion on abortion, then they shouldn’t have to contribute to federal funding of breast cancer research.
"if i cant control a woman’s body, then i want that body to die"
(p.s. anyone can get breast cancer)
won’t drink lukewarm water but i’ll put another person’s genitals in my mouth
one time i got a fish and my dad made me name it james pond
A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”
Vampire: “The fair is in town, maybe a date will help…”
human spends the whole time in the hall of mirrors
WE HAVE A NEW WINNER.